Your moods can be extremely deceptive

Your own moods can be extremely deceptive. They can, and probably do, trick you into believing your life is far worse than it really is.

When you’re in a good mood, life looks great. You have perspective, common sense, and wisdom. In good moods, thing don’t feel so hard, problems seem less formidable and easier to solve. When you’re in a good mood, relationships seem to flow and communication is easy. If you are criticized, you take it in stride.

On the contrary, when you’re in a bad mood, life looks unbearably serious and difficult. You have very little perspective. You take things personally and often misinterpret those around you, as you impute malignant motives into their actions.

Here’s the catch: People don’t realize their moods are always on the run. They think instead that their lives have suddenly become worse in the past day, or even the last hour.

Learning from our glorious past

We are all more or less proud of our past Indian civilization, but we actually do not know the real nature of that civilization. We cannot be proud of our past material civilization, which is now a thousand times greater than in days gone by. It is said that we are passing through the age of darkness, the Kali-yuga. What is this darkness? The darkness cannot be due to backwardness in material knowledge, because we now have more of it than formerly. If not we ourselves, our neighbors, at any rate, have plenty of it. Therefore, we must conclude that the darkness of the present age is not due to a lack of material advancement, but that we have lost the clue to our spiritual advancement, which is the prime necessity of human life and the criterion of the highest type of human civilization.

Throwing of bombs from airplanes is no advancement of civilization from the primitive, uncivilized practice of dropping big stones on the heads of enemies from the tops of hills. Improvement of the art of killing our neighbors by means of machine guns and poisonous gases is certainly no advancement from primitive barbarism, which prided itself on its art of killing by bows and arrows. Nor does the development of a sense of pampered selfishness prove anything more than intellectual animalism. True human civilization is very different from all these states, and therefore in the Katha Upanishad there is the emphatic call "Please wake up and try to understand the boon that you now have in this human form of life. The path of spiritual realization is very difficult; it is sharp like a razor's edge. That is the opinion of learned transcendental scholars."

Thus, while others were yet in the womb of historical oblivion, the sages of India had developed a different kind of civilization, which enabled them to know themselves. They had discovered that we are not at all material entities, but that we are all spiritual, permanent, and indestructible servants of the Absolute. But because we have, against our better judgment, chosen to completely identify ourselves with this present material existence, our sufferings have multiplied according to the inexorable law of birth and death, with its consequent diseases and anxieties. These sufferings cannot be really mitigated by any provision of material happiness, because matter and spirit are completely different elements. It is just as if you took an aquatic animal out of water and put it on the land, supplying all manner of happiness possible on land. The deadly sufferings of the animal are not capable of being relieved at all until it is taken out of its foreign environment. Spirit and matter are completely contradictory things. All of us are spiritual entities. We cannot have perfect happiness, which is our birthright, however much we may meddle with the affairs of mundane things. Perfect happiness can be ours only when we are restored to our natural state of spiritual existence. This is the distinctive message of our ancient Indian civilization, this is the message of the Gita, this is the message of the Vedas and the Puranas, and this is the message of all the real acaryas.

Choose your battles wisely

“Choose your battles wisely” is important in living a happy and contented life. It suggests that life is filled with opportunities to choose between making a big deal out of something or simply letting it go, realizing it doesn’t really matter. If you choose your battles wisely, you’ll be far more effective in winning those that are truly important.

Certainly there will be times when you will want or need to argue, confront, or even fight for something you believe in. Many people, however, argue, confront, and fight over practically anything, turning their lives into a series of battles over relatively small issues. There is so much frustration in living this type of life that you lose track of what is truly relevant.

The tiniest disagreement or glitch in your plans can be made into a big deal if your goal (conscious or unconscious) is to have everything work out in your favor.

The truth is, life is rarely exactly the way we want it to be, and other people often don’t act as we would like them to. Moment to moment, there are aspects of life that we like and others that we don’t. There are always going to be people who disagree with you, people who do things differently, and things that don’t work out. If you fight against this principle of life, you’ll spend most of your life fighting battles.

A more peaceful way to live is to decide consciously which battles are worth fighting and which are better left alone.

Handling mistakes we make in life…

In every mistake there is the potential for growth. Inherent in every problem there is a solution. When you take the process too seriously, however, you interfere with your ability to see answers.

The next time you make a mistake, instead of dealing with it in your usual way, laugh at yourself instead. You will be surprised at how quickly and easily you are able to resolve the issue.

A decision to make light of your mistakes, to remain lighthearted, doesn’t mean you don’t care or that you’re not concerned with making an error. It simply means that you refuse to compound a problem by making a bigger deal out of something than is absolutely necessary. It means that you understand the value of keeping your perspective and sense of humor even in the face of adversity.

The fact is: The more seriously you take your mistakes, the more you make them. And the more seriously you take your problems, the more you create them. When you make a big deal out of something you have done wrong, you are actually setting the stage to repeat the mistake.

Keep your mind open to suggestions to new and better ways of doing things. Learn from the mistake and keep moving ahead in life.

Ignorance is no excuse

At present everyone is suffering due to ignorance, just as one contracts a disease out of ignorance. If one does not know hygienic principles, he will not know what will contaminate him. Therefore due to ignorance there is infection, and we suffer from disease. A criminal may say, "I did not know the law," but he will not be excused if he commits a crime. Ignorance is no excuse. Similarly, a child, not knowing that fire will burn, will touch the fire. The fire does not think, "This is a child, and he does not know I will burn." No, there is no excuse. Just as there are state laws, there are also stringent laws of nature, and these laws will act despite our ignorance of them. If we do something wrong out of ignorance, we must suffer. This is the law. Whether the law is a state law or a law of nature, we risk suffering if we break it.

The guru's business is to see that no human being suffers in this material world. No one can claim that he is not suffering. That is not possible. In this material world, there are three kinds of suffering. These are miseries arising from the material body and mind, from other living entities, and from the forces of nature.

The guru sees that suffering is due to ignorance, which is compared to darkness. How can one in darkness be saved? By light. The guru takes the torchlight of knowledge and presents it before the living entity enveloped in darkness. That knowledge relieves him from the sufferings of the darkness of ignorance.

Many times we do not ask – why we do what we do

Eight monkeys are put in a room. In the middle of the room is a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas hanging from a hook on the ceiling. Each time a monkey tries to climb the ladder; all the monkeys are sprayed with ice water, which makes them miserable.

Sooner enough, whenever a monkey attempts to climb the ladder, all of the other monkeys, not wanting to be sprayed, set upon him and beat him up. Soon, none of the eight monkeys ever attempts to climb the ladder.

One of the original monkeys is then removed, and a new monkey is put in the room. Seeing the bananas and the ladder, he wonders why none of the other monkeys are doing the obvious, but, undaunted, he immediately begins to climb the ladder. All the other monkeys fall upon him and beat him silly. He has no idea why. However, he no longer attempts to climb the ladder.

A second original monkey is removed and replaced. The newcomer again attempts to climb the ladder, but all the other monkeys hammer the crap out of him. This includes the previous new monkey, who, grateful that he's not on the receiving end this time, participates in the beating because all the other monkeys are doing it. However, he has no idea why he's attacking the new monkey.

One by one, all the original monkeys are replaced.

Eight new monkeys are now in the room. None of them have ever been sprayed by ice water.

None of them attempt to climb the ladder. All of them will enthusiastically beat up any new monkey who tries, without having any idea why.

Many times we do not ask – why we do what we do!

How to get good sleep?

1. Try relaxation & deep breathing exercises

Put things into perspective before you become upset or angry. Look into some relaxation techniques and deep breathing exercises.

2. Exercise regularly

Exercise increases heart and lung fitness while reducing stress, anxiety and insomnia. It also raises your endorphin levels -- the natural "mood elevators" produced by the brain. Endorphins reduce pain, relax muscles, and produce feelings of well being. As a result, sleep will be deeper and more restful. Even something as simple as brisk walking can have a positive effect, if done regularly.

3. Keep mentally stimulated

Boredom can actually keep you awake! If you’re physically and mentally active, you’re less likely to have poor sleep problem.

4. Eat properly

Limit your intake of fat and fried foods. Avoid eating a large or heavy meal within two to three hours of bedtime. While such a meal can make you feel drowsy at first, you’ll probably toss and turn during the night.

5. Take a warm bath before bed

Just before bedtime (1-2 hours before sleeping), take bath with warm water. This will send blood away from the brain to the skin surfaces, and make you feel relaxed and drowsy. Your body temperature, raised by the warm water, will soon drop if you have a moderately cool bedroom. This will initiate sleepiness and more deep sleep.

6. Establish a bedtime ritual

Establish a bedtime ritual. Read Bhagavad-gita or other good books. Take your mind off the day’s busy-ness by venturing into the sublime thoughts.

Relevant enquiry

As long as a man is in the full vigor of life, he forgets the naked truth of death, which he has to meet. Thus a foolish man makes no relevant inquiry about the real problems of life. Everyone thinks that he will never die, although he sees evidence of death before his eyes at every second. Here is the distinction between animalism and humanity. An animal like a goat has no sense of its impending death. Although its brother goat is being slaughtered, the goat, being allured by the green grass offered to it, will stand peacefully waiting to be slaughtered next. On the other hand, if a human being sees his fellow man being killed by an enemy, he either fights to save his brother or leaves, if possible, to save his own life. That is the difference between a man and a goat.

An intelligent man knows that death is born along with his own birth. He knows that he is dying at every second and that the final touch will be given as soon as his term of life is finished. He therefore prepares himself for the next life or for liberation from the disease of repeated birth and death.

A foolish man, however, does not know that this human form of life is obtained after a series of births and deaths imposed in the past by the laws of nature. He does not know that a living entity is an eternal being, who has no birth and death. Birth, death, old age, and disease are external impositions on a living entity and are due to his contact with material nature and to his forgetfulness of his eternal, godly nature and qualitative oneness with the Absolute Whole.

Human life provides the opportunity to know this eternal fact, or truth. Thus the very beginning of the Vedanta-sutra advises that because we have this valuable form of human life, it is our duty-now-to inquire, What is Brahman, the Absolute Truth?

Expectations and Frustrations

We have to understand the link between our expectations and our frustration levels. Whenever we expect something to be a certain way and it isn’t we’re upset and we suffer.

On the other had, when we let go of our expectations, when you accept life as it is, we’re free. To hold on is to be serious and uptight. To let go is to lighten up.

A good exercise is to try to approach a single day without expectations. Don’t expect people to be friendly. When they’re not, you won’t be surprised or bothered. If they are, you’ll be delighted.

Don’t expect your day to be problem free. Instead, as problems come up, say to yourself, “Ah, another hurdle to overcome.” As you approach your day in this manner you’ll notice how graceful life can be.

Rather than fighting against life, pretty soon, with practice, you’ll lighten up your entire life.

Grateful when feeling good & graceful when feeling bad

The happier person on earth isn’t always happy. In fact, the happiest people all have their fair share of low moods, problems, and disappointments. Often the difference between a person who is happy and someone who is unhappy isn’t how often they get low, or even how low they drop, but instead, it’s what they do with their low moods. How do they relate to their feelings?

Most people have it backward. When they are feeling down, they roll up their sleeves and get to work. They take their low moods very seriously and try to figure out and analyze what’s wrong. They try to force themselves out of their low state, which tends to compound the problem rather than solve it.

When you observe peaceful, relaxed people, you find that when they are feeling good, they are very grateful. They understand that both positive and negative feelings come and go, and that there will come a time when they won’t be feeling so good. To happy people, this is okay; it’s the way of things. They accept the inevitability of passing feelings. So, when they are feeling depressed, angry, or stressed out, they relate to these feelings with the same openness and wisdom. Rather than fight their feelings and panic simply because they are feeling bad, they accept their feelings, knowing that this too shall pass.

Rather than stumbling and fighting against their negative feelings, they are graceful in their acceptance of them. This allows them to come gently and gracefully out of negative feeling states into more positive states of mind.

The next time you’re feeling bad, instead of panicking, you can be graceful and calm. Know that if you don’t fight your negative feelings, if you are graceful, they will pass away.

Watering the Root

Actually our position is that we are always rendering service to someone, either to our family, country, or society. If we have no one to serve, sometimes we keep a pet cat or dog and render service to it. All these factors prove that we are constitutionally meant to render service, yet in spite of serving to the best of our ability, we are not satisfied. Nor is the person to whom we are rendering that service satisfied. On the material platform, everyone is frustrated.

The reason for this is that the service being rendered is not properly directed. For example, if we want to render service to a tree, we must water the root. If we pour water on the leaves, branches and twigs, there is little benefit. Similarly if the Supreme Personality of Godhead is served, all other parts and parcels will be automatically satisfied. Consequently all welfare activities as well as service to society, family, and nation are realized by serving the Supreme Personality of Godhead.

It is the duty of every human being to understand his constitutional position with God and to act accordingly. If this is possible, then our lives become successful. Sometimes, however, we feel challenging and say, "There is no God," or "I am God," or even, "I don't care for God." But in actuality this challenging spirit will not save us. God is there, and we can see Him at every moment. If we refuse to see God in our life, then He will be present before us as cruel death. If we do not choose to see Him in one feature, we will see Him in another. There are different features of the Supreme Personality of Godhead because He is the original root of the entire cosmic manifestation. In one sense, it is not possible for us to escape Him.

Tips for a Better Sleep

The quality and quantity of your sleep can make a sizable difference on how productive you'll be the next day. Here are few tips to help you get the sleep you need and deserve:

1. Unwind early in the evening. Try to deal with worries and distractions several hours before bedtime.

2. Give yourself "permission" to go to bed.
Recognize that some minimum amount of sleep is essential for body to rejuvenate.

3. Develop a sleep ritual. Doing the same things each night just before bed signals your body to settle down for the night.

4. Keep regular hours. Keep your biological clock in check by going to bed around the same time each night and waking up close to the same time each morning – even on weekends.

5. Create a restful place to sleep. Sleep in a cool, dark room that is free from noises that may disturb your sleep.

6. Sleep on a comfortable, supportive mattress. It's difficult to sleep on a bed that's too small, too soft or too hard.

7. Exercise regularly. Regular exercise can help relieve daily tension and stress – but don't exercise too close to bedtime or you may have trouble falling asleep.

Dr. Frog Philosophy

There was once a frog who had lived all his life in a well. One day a friend visited him and informed him of the existence of the Atlantic Ocean.

"Oh, what is this Atlantic Ocean?" asked the frog in the well.

"It is a vast body of water," his friend replied.

"How vast? Is it double the size of this well?"

"Oh, no, much larger," his friend replied.

"How much larger? Ten times the size?"

In this way the frog went on calculating. But what was the possibility of his ever understanding the depths and far reaches of the great ocean?

Our faculties, experience, and powers of speculation are always limited. The frog was always thinking in terms relative to his well. He had no power to think otherwise.

Similarly, the scientists are estimating the Absolute Truth, the cause of all causes, with their imperfect senses and minds, and thus they are bound to be bewildered. The essential fault of the so-called scientists is that they have adopted the inductive process to arrive at their conclusions. For example, if a scientist wants to determine whether or not man is mortal by the inductive process, he must study every man to try to discover if some or one of them may be immortal. The scientist says, "I cannot accept the proposition that all men are mortal. There may be some men who are immortal. I have not yet seen every man. Therefore how can I accept that man is mortal?" This is called the inductive process. He may study thousand, two thousand, five thousand, but he cannot study all the men. Therefore his conclusion remains always defective.

And the deductive process means you take the idea from superior person that man is mortal. Your father, your teacher, or your guru says that man is mortal, and you accept it.

If you accept, then your knowledge is perfect.

Therefore inductive process is not always perfect. The deductive process, from the authority, the knowledge received, is always perfect.

It is easier to criticize…

Once upon a time there was a painter who had just completed his course under disciple hood of a great painter. This young artist decided to assess his skills. He decided to give his best strokes on the canvass. He took 3 days and painted beautiful scenery.
He wanted people's opinion about his caliber and painting skills.

He put his creation at a busy street-crossing. And just down below a board which read-"Gentlemen, I have painted this piece. Since I'm new to this profession I might have committed some mistakes in my strokes etc. Please put a cross wherever you see a mistake."

While he came back in the evening to collect his painting he was completely shattered to see that whole canvass was filled with Xs (crosses) and some people had even written their comments on the painting.

Disheartened and broken completely he ran to his master's place and burst into tears. Sobbing and crying he told his master about what happened and showed the pathetic state of his creation which was filled with crosses and correction remarks.

This young artist was breathing heavily and master heard him saying "I'm useless and if this is what I have learnt to paint I'm not worth becoming a painter. People have rejected me completely. I feel like dying"

Master smiled and suggested "My Son, I will prove that you are a great artist and have learnt a flawless painting." Young disciple couldn't believe it and said "I have lost faith in me and I don't think I am good enough. Don't make false hopes..

"Do as I say without questioning it. It WILL work." Master interrupted him.

Young artist reluctantly agreed and two days later early morning he presented a replica of his earlier painting to his master. Master took that gracefully and smiled.

"Come with me." master said.

They reached the same street-square early morning and displayed the same painting exactly at the same place. Now master took out another board which read -"Gentlemen, I have painted this piece. Since I'm new to this profession I might have committed some mistakes in my strokes etc. I have put a box with colors and brushes just below. Please do a favor. If you see a mistake, kindly pick up the brush and correct it." Master and disciple walked back home.

They both visited the place same evening. Young painter was surprised to see that actually there was not a single correction done so far. Next day again they visited and found painting remained untouched. They say the painting was kept there for a month for no correction came in!

It is easier to criticize, but difficult to improve. If you want to help people improve their behavior it is worth investing your effort in learning how to help people change their behaviors, attitudes and skills. Also, always remember not to get carried away or judge yourself by someone else’s criticism and feel depressed. Take criticism in your stride; consider that which are genuine and implement those which you think is the best to improve you as a person!!

Practice humility – Do not try to prove yourself to others

Humility and inner peace go hand in hand. The less compelled you are to try to prove yourself to others, the easier it is to feel peaceful inside.

Proving yourself is a dangerous trap. It takes an enormous amount of energy to be continually pointing out your accomplishments, bragging, or trying to convince others of your worth as a human being. Pride and arrogance actually dilutes the positive feelings you receive from an accomplishment or something you are proud of. To make matters worse, the more you try to prove yourself, the more others will avoid you, talk behind your back about your insecure need to boast, and perhaps even dislike you.

Ironically, however, the less you care about seeking approval, the more approval you seem to get. People are drawn to those with a quiet, inner confidence, people who don’t need to make themselves look good, be “right” all the time, or steal the glory.

Most people love a person who doesn’t need to show-off, a person who shares from his or her heart and not from his or her ego.

Search for the grain of truth in other opinions

Almost everyone feels that their own opinions are good ones; otherwise they wouldn’t be sharing them with you. One of the destructive things that many of us do, however, is compare someone else’s opinion to our own. And, when it doesn’t fall in line with our belief, we either dismiss it or find fault with it. We feel smug, the other person feels diminished, and we learn nothing.

Almost every opinion has some merit, especially if we are looking for merit, rather than looking for errors. The next time someone offers you an opinion, rather than judge or criticize it, see if you can find a grain of truth in what the person is saying. If you think about it, when you judge someone else or their opinion, it really doesn’t say anything about the other person, but it says quite a bit about your need to be judgmental.

If you practice this simple idea, some wonderful things will begin to happen: you’ll begin to understand those you interact with, other will be drawn to your accepting and loving energy, your learning curve will be enhanced, and perhaps most important, you’ll feel much better about yourself.

Try to put your problems on your back burner

Using you back burner means allowing your mind to solve a problem while you are busy doing something else.

The back burner of your mind works in the same way as the back burner of a stove. While on low heat, the cooking process mixes, blends, and simmers the ingredients into a tasty meal. The way you prepare a meal is to put various ingredients into the pot, mix them up, and leave them alone. Often the less you interfere, the better the result.

In much the same way, we can solve many of life’s problems (serious and otherwise) if we feed the back burner of our mind with a list of problems, facts, and variables, and possible solutions. Just as when we make soup or a sauce, the thoughts and ideas we feed the back burner of our mind must be left alone to simmer properly.

Whether you are struggling to solve a problem or can’t remember a person’s name, your back burner is always available to help you. It puts our quieter, softer, and sometimes most intelligent source of thinking to work for us on issues that we have no immediate answer for.

The back burner is not a prescription for denial or procrastination. In other words, while you do want to put your problems on your back burner, you don’t want to turn the burner off. Instead, you want to gently hold the problem in your mind without actively analyzing it. This simple technique will help you solve many problems and will greatly reduce the stress and effort in your life.

Reason we are tempted to put others down

You have chances to point out to someone their mistakes, things they could or should have done differently, ways they can improve. You have chances to “correct” people, privately as well as in front of others.

However, most of the time, the reason we are tempted to put others down, correct them, or show them how we’re right and they’re wrong is that our ego mistakenly believes that if we point out how someone else is wrong, we must be right, and therefore we will feel better.

Actually, however, if you pay attention to the way you feel after you put someone down, you’ll notice that you feel worse than before the put-down.

Avoid putting others down, correct them, or show them how you are right and how they are wrong. Do it only when it is absolutely necessary and when it is your duty as a parent, guardian or a friend to do so.

The power of words

A group of frogs were traveling through the woods, and two of them fell into a deep pit. When the other frogs saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead. The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit with all their might. The other frogs kept telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead. Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died.

The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did you not hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.

This story teaches two lessons:
1. There is power of life and death in the tongue. An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through the day.
2. A destructive word to someone who is down can be what it takes to kill them.

Be careful of what you say. Speak life to those who cross your path. The power of words... it is sometimes hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long way. Anyone can speak words that tend to rob another of the spirit to continue in difficult times. Special is the individual who will take the time to encourage another.

What's New at Akshaya Patra...

‘Click a Smile’ Photography Exhibition

‘Click a Smile’ will showcase an array of smiles from across India. The exhibition will showcase 20 best photographs from over 350 entries chosen by Mr. Senthil, Winner of many prestigious photography awards including awards at Cannes International-2001 & 2003. Mr. Chitranga Chaitanya Dasa, Program Director, of Akshaya Patra will also be gracing the event. The exhibits will be showcased at Alliance Francaise Bangalore, Millers Tank Bund Road, Vasanth Nagar, Bengaluru, Karnataka on the 15th and 16th of December, 2010 from 10 am to 6.30 pm.

Akshaya Patra to Teach Children in Corporation Schools

Akshaya Patra Foundation, which currently serves food to schoolchildren under the mid-day meal programme, is now working with students to help them fare better in academics. Vidya Akshaya Patra, an educational initiative of the Akshaya Patra Foundation has been given renewed impetus by Bruhat Bengalooru Mahanagara Palike (BBMP), the administrative body for the civic and infrastructural assets of Bangalore, to conduct classes in areas of the city that suffer from poor student performance in Board exams. Nearly 1120 students in 16 schools will benefit from the program, which will provide students with extra classes in Maths, Science, English and Kannada over a period of 107 days lasting till March of 2011.

For more information on these and many more events coming up, please visit www.akshayapatra.org